#YouandYourGirl is a new monthly series. Each month I will write a post that will announce the opportunity for you to connect with your girl.
10 Days of Conversation Starters provide 10 sparks for you and your girl to get a good conversation going. They are exactly what they are called: starters. Take the answer your girl gives you and continue with more questions to keep her talking and you learning more about your girl.
Let her know you want to learn more about her. Who can resist sharing with someone who wants to know you better?
Many of these questions are taken from conversations with my own girls. Some of the questions are just for fun; others are meant to open doors to deeper conversations. Both kinds of questions will help to bring you and your girl into a closer, deeper relationship!
You don’t have to be a mom to use them either! Friends, mentors, grandmas, teachers or aunts – any one who loves a girl can get the talking started!
The goal of today’s conversation starter is to find out what your girl sees as the most important things in her life. Her response tells you how she likes to have fun and who she likes to be with.
See this as your first opportunity in the study of your girl over the next ten days. You might even want to makes some notes after your conversations so you can remember what she says.
Then, take this information and plan ahead to incorporate some of the things you know now are her favorites.
Are her favorite things something you can duplicate? Do you see a pattern? Maybe they all have to do with friends or family. It could be she loves to do things that are adventurous or outdoors. She might be the type of girl who likes to repeat activities because they make her comfortable. Study your girl.
Today’s conversation starter can give you insight to your girl’s heart. Her answer might reveal her greatest heartache; the thing in her life that makes her most insecure.
You might discover something that could be changed and she just hasn’t realized it. On the other hand, her reply can give you information so you can comfort her.
Enjoy this season of getting to know this precious girl. Our children grow up. Those we mentor can reach stages where they no longer need us. Embrace these conversations today while you can.
Maybe you already knew the types of things your girl loathes. For others, today’s conversation will bring totally new insight.
Today’s question could lead to a gentle teaching moment. An encouragement to learn the gifts and talents God has given her and the knowledge that when we are doing work, which utilizes those gifts, we will enjoy life the most.
A fun spin on yesterday’s question, today’s conversation can open the door to hear a bit of your girl’s dreams. How does she envision herself in her future?
You can ask all kinds of questions to keep this one rolling:
• Where would you like to work?
• How long would you have to go to school?
• What aspect of the job makes it the best for you?
Before today’s question, ask the Lord to give you His wisdom and His insight into your girl’s answer.
If she is open to talking more in depth, ask her when this fear came into her life. Take a moment to look up some scripture about fear such as 1 John 4:18 “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” If she is open, pray together at the end of your conversation, asking the Lord to take away her fear and set her free in His love.
Today’s question is one that could probably go on for hours!
After she shares with you what she finds attractive, if it fits the situation, share with her what you found attractive in her dad or your husband. Don’t get too serious, but at the same time, draw her attention to traits that reveal a guy’s character.
Try talking about movie characters you have watched together and admirable qualities in them. For instance, Will Turner is willing to risk his life to save Elizabeth’s in Pirates of the Caribbean. He demonstrates selflessness.
Each one of us has a tender spot in our hearts where we are more apt to get hurt than another. For some of us it is honesty. For others it might be selfishness. The answer to this question tells you what your girl values most for what we value most we are most susceptible to getting hurt.
Share with your girl a time when you experienced hurt from a friend and you have chosen to forgive. This is an open door to teach her forgiveness is for our sakes, not just the one who is being forgiven.
I love this question! There is nothing I love more than blessing someone by serving them. (Yep, you guessed it! My love language is acts of service!)
This is your opportunity to bless your child in the way they receive it best. Get the answer to this one and love on them like crazy!
I choose this question for the last day because this is the day to dream. What are the things you want to do before your lifetime is done?
Take this dream and maybe, just maybe, this could be the one thing you and your girl can do together before she leaves home one day. Who knows? With God, all things are possible!
If you enjoyed this month’s You and Your Girl series, you can read all the previous months here.