I wanted to announce the winner from yesterday’s give away:
* Melaine McKinley won the book – Royal by Blood by Jennifer Johnson
* Mandy A won my teaching CD “Building a Bridge to Your Child’s Heart”
Melaine and Mandy, please be sure to email me at Lynn@LynnCowell.com and let me know the address you would like me to ship your prizes to!
I have so enjoyed reading all of your ideas on how we can spend quality time with our kids…you have so much wisdom. I am going to leave yesterday’s post up for today as my normal “In the Know” post is on Wednesdays. I hope you’ll come back again for our time together on Friday!
Recently Dannah Gresh shared on Focus on the Family information from her new book, “How to Keep the Little in Your Little Girl”. Dannah shared statistics pointing to parent/child connectiveness as the number one way to destructive behaviors prevention in our children. This is all the reason I need to motivate me to build a bridge to my child’s heart.
Maybe like you, I’m right smack in the tail end of child raising. With one in college, one in high school and one in middle school, I shuffle many times during the day between life coach, listener and law bringer. I am sure many of you juggle similiar roles. While I am on this journey, I have found a few ways to reach that parent/child connectiveness that we do want.
1. Be informed
Care enough about your child to know what is going on in their culture. Ask open ended questions about their friends. Sit and watch their tv programs with them. Be aware of what music they are listening to and listen yourself; know what they are putting in their hearts and minds. Follow blogs such as my own; every Wednesday I write post concerning today’s teen and their culture. To receive these informative posts each Wednesday, just add your email to the subscription box in the right hand corner and they will start coming right away!
2. Be approachable
Respond; don’t react.Our kids often feel that we will pass judgement or just give advice if they open up. Learn to listen only when they talk. If they need guidance, choose a time when they are not angry or upset. Consider their feelings at that moment and just listen.
3. Be available
With a list in hand, I am all about getting it done. Can you relate? So often, when my kids start chatting I am knee deep in writing or washing. More than once, they have said, “Can you stop just a minute so I can talk to you?”. Wow is that convicting!
When they talk, our kids need 100% of us; with no distractions. No phone. No text. Just us. Unfortunately, they also open up at the most inopportune times! (I head to bed at 9:00 p.m. They don’t start talking until 11:00 p.m.!). If we want to connect, we have to be there.
4. Be vulnerable
Do our children have the opinion that our growing up years were free of trip ups? Have we shared with them that we understand because we’ve been there? Not only do they need to know that we struggled then, they also need to know we struggle now. By sharing some of our trials, it helps them to know we are real in our faith as well. It can give us a place to meet.
5. Be their discipler
Too often, we want to hand over the responsibility of discipling our children to the church. No one, though, is going to take interest and invest in the lives of our children like we, their parents. As they get older, we need to continue to invest in them. One great way is by doing a Bible study with your student. (This spring I will be releasing “His Revolutionary Love; Jesus’ Radical Pursuit of You” – a great study for you and your daughter to do together!)
Click “comments” below (or go to www.LynnCowell.com if you are reading this on FaceBook or as an email subscriber) and give one idea of how we can spend valuable with our children. I can’t wait to hear your ideas!