Do You Want it Most or Do You Want it Now?

5 Habits of a Woman Who Doesn't Quit

There is no way I can handle one more “no”, God. I thought this desire was from You? Why do I keep hearing “no” then?

Let me back up a bit.

My not-going-to-quit-but-oh-how-I-want-to journey began with a nudging. Ever experience the nudge? That gentle push in your heart that you just have to obey or you’re going to be miserable? God began pressing on my heart the need young women have to know just how He feels about Him and He let me know I was part of the “letting them know”.

Against my will, I took the first step by inviting seven girls over for pizza and brownies in order to share my own story of falling in love with Jesus.

The night was horrible.

With interruptions galore, by the end of the night, I just wanted to toss my pizza boxes in the garbage and crawl in bed. But first, I would let Jesus know how mad I was that I had obeyed Him and He had let me down. But even this plan didn’t go as planned. One young woman lingered asking for more. I’m not proud to say I basically told her to find someone else. My disappointment in the night whispered to my heart Don’t make a commitment it! It won’t be worth it. But the teen was adamant. She was ready to take her faith deeper.

A week later, we headed to the bookstore to find the perfect book to go through. Sitting cross-legged on the carpet, thumbing through book after book, I just couldn’t seem to find a book that taught young women how Jesus was absolutely crazy about them … so I decided to write it.

That’s how I ended up putting myself in a spot where I wanted to quit. I had contacted publishers, agents, any one who would listen to my passion for teen girls and hear my proposal. All I heard was “no”. Each time I received a rejection, my response was different. On my good days, I repeated lines my friends gave me, “Each no takes you closer to your yes.” “God’s got this in His timing.” On other days, I believed the line my mind said to me. You know the truth. You are unqualified. With no college education, no background in English and no platform as they call it, you don’t have what it takes. 

Even though what my mind told me was true, I couldn’t shake what I also knew was true: girls needed this message. So, with the Holy Spirit empowering me, I kept going. I knew there were some short cuts I could take to get my book published faster, yet I felt I was to wait and continue pursuing the traditional route. Five years and nineteen rejections later, I finally heard “yes” to a publisher taking on “His Revolutionary Love: Jesus’ Radical Pursuit of You”.  

I sure wish that all those years ago I had had Nicki Koziarz’s new book “5 Habits of a Woman Who Doesn’t Quit.” Fortunately, for those of you who are struggling to quit like me, her book is available now and Proverbs 31 Ministries Online Bible Studies is gearing up for our next free Bible study using her book.

Today, I’m giving away a copy of “5 Habits of a Woman Who Doesn’t Quit.” To be entered for an opportunity to win, please share in the blog comments one area you need help not quitting. If you’re busy, simply share, “I’m in!”  


****Congratulations to Cassie who commented on March 31st at 7:30 a.m.****

Congratulations to Mildred, the winner of the LOVED bracelet and Magnetic book I gave away on my blog on March 21st! She posted on March 21st at 8:04 a.m.









  1. Thank you so much for this encouragement. This book sounds like exactly what I need right now as my husband and I begin the process to adopt through the foster care system. It most certainly isn’t an easy process, but I’m confident that this is what God is calling us to do.

  2. Today I really need help and prayer so My husband and I both don’t quit on disciplining our 12 year old daughter for something she has done. To love her is to discipline her. This really is a tough one for a 12 year old to get. For her to love us is to respect and obey us. So tough. May we not quit! Thank you.

    1. Lynn Cowell says:

      Lord, You know how very hard it is to discipline children as You have to discipline us. Give Cassie and her husband James 1:5 wisdom – liberally and exactly what they need for this situation. Amen

  3. I am feeling the calling to go back to school to get my BSN but the timing never seems to be right and we surely are not financially ready and we never are. I am plunging ahead anyway because through pray I am feeling lead to do this. I have quit before which is why I want to do nicki’s bible study.

  4. Yes, I need help. I am discouraged in my ministry. It sometimes seem static and I just want to wade deeper into the waters. I won’t quit, but encouragement would be lovely. Or is my ego getting in the way?

    1. Lynn Cowell says:

      Lord, Martha’s humility is a beautiful thing. With this question she asks, I pray that You will empower her to lay before You the direction You want her ministry to take. Help her to discern with clarity next steps. Amen

  5. Thank you for your encouragement! And I can’t wait to read your book you wrote. I think it would pertain to any woman!! An area in my life where I feel like quitting or giving up on is pursuing our dream of moving to a new town and getting into ministry full time. Its all so scary and uncertain! But deep down I have that longing and calling to serve even more in some place! I pray and trust God will lead our family where he wants/needs us to be and even if that means staying right here and pursuing more here. For His will is the best will!

  6. Elsie Davies says:

    I am having a hard time staying focus on school. Sometimes I just want to quite, other times I will get lazy and not want to do anything but just stay home and watch t.v. I know what I need to do, but I don’t feel passionate about school anyone, and I know I am almost there is just need to hang in there. I so excited to graduate in may, only to find out i did pass a class last semester which push my graduation to December, I think this is why I have gotten tire and wanting to quit. I am trying to remind myself that God has gotten me here for a reason and I don’t want to let him down. He has been my support, from financial, emotional, and my father when I needed a father the most to be there for me. I don’t know if anyone understand where I am coming from.

  7. val kisamore says:

    I know that God has put me in the position of being both a prayer warrior and a mentor to other young women, but I’m just so lazy… I start planning and then come up with lists and lists of practical sounding excuses about why I’m not the right person to be doing these things. But, conviction continues and I am NOT going to quit.

  8. I am not sure what direction God has me in . . . I am not wanting to ask Now? I just keep reassuring myself that His timing is never late. But oh, when He makes you feel uncomfortable about the wrong direction. Thankfully He is so loving and comforting. Would love to have the book to share with the youngest of my family.

  9. I needed to hear this today. I’ve been struggling (again) with feeling like all that I thought I was supposed to do was just my idea. Did I really hear God? I need to have more than just knowledge. It needs to connect to my heart. So thank you and I would love to win this giveaway.

    1. Lynn Cowell says:

      Lord, I ask that You will either give Cristy the confirmation she needs to move forward or a peaceful release to move on. You know the plans You have for her. Reveal the next step. Amen

  10. Just what I prayed this morning. My fears of staring the thing pressing heavy on my heart…
    I stay crouched in the cave of this mindset, this stronghold of thought that once I begin it, I won’t be able to sustain it. And today I heard God say, No, Lisa, you won’t… That’s why you need Me!
    But here I stay. Day after day, sometimes busy tidying up around the thing, but never fully committing to it. Never stepping fully into it… putting my full weight on it
    And for that I am never fullfilled!
    Help me, Lord!

    1. Lynn Cowell says:

      Lord, I pray for Lisa this morning. You know what it is, Jesus, and You know the strength, courage and bravery Lisa needs. Lord, I don’t pray that You will help her to overcome her fear, but instead that she will know You are there in this thing she fears. YOU ARE THERE! Help her to take a step toward You and as she does, may she find the confidence to take the next step and the next and the next. Amen

  11. Hi Lynn, I so needed this message today. My husband left 10 years ago, leaving my son and myself behind. We have done okay — my son is a college graduate and serving in the Army. I have been praying and hoping for a new relationship with an old friend for eight of those years. I love him dearly and he just doesn’t see it. I have tried so very many times to give up and just feel pulled toward him. I would love to read “Woman who Doesn’t Quit” to help me with this! Thank you, always, for your eloquent words.

    1. Lynn Cowell says:

      Tina, thank you so much for sharing today. You are a brave woman! Lord, You know what is best for my friend. I pray that You will give her the desires of her heart. Thank you for the gift of this friendship. You are good! Amen

  12. I felt I was being obedient to a nudge I had been feeling for a long time when I started my blog at the beginning of this year. I thought that I had something to say, something that would inspire or encourage women. But there it sits, with little to no feedback – and I wonder if I should even keep doing it.

    1. Lynn Cowell says:

      Hi Friend,

      I’ve been down this road too! Blogs remind me so much of the dogwood I have blooming in my backyard right now. Planted well over 20 years ago, each year it seems to only grow an inch or two. It is no where I thought it would be by now, but it is growing.

      One thing that is helpful is getting involved in the blogging community. Visit other bloggers you resonate with. Comment on their posts. Offer to share their writings. There is something powerful about collaboration. Also check out Proverbs 31 Ministrie’s COMPEL training on honing your writing skills. I hope these help!

  13. This book is exactly what I need right now. We have three teenage daughters with one graduating, then traveling to Brazil, a junior and a sophomore. We are trying to redo our home to prepare for open houses PLUS a local flower shop just went up for sale and we are praying that our dreams of owning come true. Unfortunately, timing is not the best right now but we know if it is meant to be we will find a way for it to work. I am having a hard time focusing and not wanting to give up on our dream just because the timing is not right. Your message this morning was exactly what I needed. Thank you for being you!

  14. My husband went home to God on February 14th. Grief is so overwhelming and exhausting. I do have help and support, but there are so many things that only I can do. I don’t want to quit, I know I’m only functioning through God’s grace.

  15. I’m in. Thanks for keeping on.

  16. I am in that spot i have a calling to write and my husband encourages it now more then ever. with our 3rd child on the way i don’t feel i can handle the quest to write. my argument is i am unqualified and don’t have time or i am not very good at English or i don’t know where to start. doubt. but in my heart i know its not my words i will be writing and not my skills i will be using. how did you get over the doubt and move forward?

  17. I have been struggling in my marriage & am truly at the end of my rope. It’s affecting my confidence in my purpose & I’m starting to doubt what I’ve been called to do, really in all areas of my life. I look forward to this study and the encouragement & the renewed focus I anticipate it will bring.

  18. Staying true to God’s call to be an encourager when so often it feels like it’s going nowhere.

  19. Melissa Santos says:

    This is great.
    I’m a single 32 with no children, and have finally felt the spirit flip a page in my story but find the next page blank. I know he designed me for great things. I always find myself encouraging others. I am constantly battling the thoughts, what’s next? I want to feel like I’ve done something fabulous. Then again, I have to remind myself, the one who I should seek ability from is God. I want to finally feel capable of reaching that point I’m constantly thinking of. Break conformity and reach a point where I can say…. I like this. My feet are finally wet and this is now where I can go from. This book I feel would give me that “umph” to some sort of direction.
    Thank You and Blessings to all Women….Powerful Women of God!

  20. Encouragement to keep going reading God’s words, sharing my faith, and despite circumstances that are difficult, letting His light shine through me every single moment.

  21. Halona Luna says:

    I so need this study and book. I am a tired mama of four busy teens and I have a lot of medical problems. Praying a lot daily.

  22. Machala Vestal says:

    I desperately need help in following through with God’s will for my life. I feel over whelmed and beyond inadequate to do what He has called me to do. I am confident in God, but doubt His ability to work through me. I need to learn how to let go, and let God take over and take what little abilities I have and make them great for His glory. This book would certainly be helpful as a college student striving to follow God’s will.

  23. My husband and I want to read the Bible more and together. There’s always something to distract us or we just don’t know where to begin.
    I’m in!

  24. I need to quit giving up on my husband, I need to wait on the Lord to send him, and him to find me. I’m in!

  25. I need help in not giving up to defeat and the Devil’s taunts when my pain is terrible and trust that God will heal me in His time and that He has a plan

  26. Love this! God is so faithful!!!
    One place I need help in not quitting is praying for my husband faithfully. We’ve been married 41 years and I don’t get it that a person can say they’re a Christian, then stop going to church, stop reading the Word, (maybe stop praying, but of course I really can’t know that for sure)…and I see no fruit… no sharing the Gospel, no teaching or training our kids, or grand kids in the things of God…and acting rude, impatient etc…. I just have a hard time even being around him and especially praying for him…
    Thanks for this!

  27. Thank you so much for this post! I believe God is using you to speak directly to my heart. I have been feeling the “nudge” that God wants me to begin writing a blog of my own. Yet every step forward feels like a step back. I had a friend start my blog page but I can’t figure out how to make it work. When I have an idea to write about suddenly the day is so full; I haven’t had the time to write; and have forgotten what I was going to write about. Finally I struggle with the same doubts about being qualified to write about God in the first place! Your post gives me hope to continue to persevere. If God has called me to it, He will see me through. Thank you for your transparency!

  28. 6 months ago I befan working in our church as a staff for our kids deparment, we had people
    leave us right and left. i felt called to this and now I’m doubting this decision. I think this book will help me not to quit

  29. Karen Smith says:

    I could sure use this book, I am constantly wanting to give up and quit. I get so discouraged with all my health issues. Can’t seem to give up the habit that is contributing to them.
    Definitely need prayer!

  30. Our family will be moving 1,830 mi to the West on May 9 to plant a church in the West as NAMB missionaries. We are packing, finishing up ministries at our home church, and finishing up school with our kids and our current local jobs. We have no jobs where we are going, although I have applied and am praying for an interview invitation. We have a missions apt. we can stay in for 2 months, while we look for a house to rent. Finding people to support our ministry monthly has not been an easy task. Honestly, we have moving expenses, but after that… Our families are not supportive, and even at times, many Christians, who we thought would be supporters and encouragers have been quite the opposite. We are going anyway! We have to be obedient and NOT QUIT! Prayers are appreciated, please!!

  31. I need encouragement to not quit when being a mom is hard but it is the most important job and critical to do well!

  32. Jennifer Davis says:

    Hey there! Just wanted to say THANK YOU for not giving up, I had been searching for a devotional for my almost 13 year I3 year old that would teach her just that! So again, thank uh thank you, I praise God for you! ?

    1. Lynn Cowell says:

      Thank you so much, Jennifer! Devotions for a Revolutionary Year is a great way to “drip” in God’s truth to a young girls heart! I hope you like it!

  33. Kathleen MacInnes says:

    Please help me not to quit the job I love doing. I feel so betrayed by events that have taken place at my place of work and it would be so easy to give up and have some peace from the battle. I know that God placed me there for a reason but the battle is so fierce. Help me to have the courage to stick it out and not quit. I’ M IN

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