Is That What I’m Feeling?

Packed in like gummy bears in a hot car, my husband and I waited in the church lobby for the concert to start. Out of nowhere my husband asked, “Why do women size up a woman when she walks in the room?” Oh my…he saw that? Are we as women so obvious with our insecurities that men see it too?

How can she afford that purse?
I wish I could get my nails done.
Does she work out or just watch what she eats?

I am embrassed to admit that I have done this too, but until Greg pointed it out to me that day, I never thought about why.

Curosity? Sometimes.
Insecurity? Often.
Jealousy? Bingo.

Jealousy. I believe it is one emotion that fits hand and hand with the performance.

It’s an emotion that’s been around for a long time! The Bible tells a story of two women who dealt with jealousy and it happened in “church” too!

MWNK – Married with no kids. That’s Hannah. It’s not what she wants to be. In fact, being barren caused Hannah much pain. 1 Samuel 1 says year after year, Hannah would go with her husband to worship and sacrifice to God. Trouble is…so did Elkanah’s other wife, Peninnah. Unlike Hannah, Peninnah had plenty of children. We are told in verse 6 “…her rival kept provoking her in order to irritate her. This went on year after year. Whenever Hannah went up to the house of the Lord, her rival provoked her until she wept and would not eat.” Now that is one woman who was getting under her skin!

Why would Peninnah choose this time, when they were going to worship God to provoke Hannah? Verse five tells us, “But to Hannah he (Elkhanah her husband) gave a double portion because he loved her…” Ahh…jealousy. Hannah had SOMETHING she didn’t. She let it brew and boil in her heart until it simply oozed out of her!

Friends, when we let insecurity, jealousy, irritation brew and boil, it is going to come out no matter how hard we might try to hide it. I want to be free. Free of insecurity, judgment, expectations, ambition…you name it; any sin that can marinate inside my heart and finds it way to my mouth.

Jesus…set us free. Free of ourselves so we can be complete in You. We need You today. We need You this weekend. Remove the yuck and leave behind Your heart.



  1. Wow you are so on the mark on that one!!! I have been guilty of that many times and I feel bad later on–Thank you for sharing. Hope you have a wonderful weekend!!!

  2. Oh this is so true. Thank you for sharing! I pray that God will help each of us in this area. Have a blessed weekend!

  3. Envy is how I define that feeling that makes you think, "why does she get this or get by with this or who does she think she is." Whatever the word defination it's a feeling mixed with judgement and pride. All of it ugly for its on my emotions. God said, and I read, "over come evil with good." I started combating my envy with good thoughts. Investing in my own life of improvement helped tons.

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