Monday with Madi: Depression Series Week 2

The process of healing begins when we are ready to move forward.

 Let it Start With You

Last week, we scratched the surface of what depression may look like for you or someone close to you.

Now, let’s dig a little deeper.

What things in your life make you feel depressed?

Could it be a relationship, family situation or something within your self? Today, let’s talk about how in moments of depression, we can call on the Lord to help us through them and help ourselves out in the process as well.

One problem I had was not dealing with the depression in my life. Because feeling depressed had become such a natural and consistent feeling for me, when it would surface, I would tend to not acknowledge it. I was sick of feeling worthless and upset constantly, so I would just move on with my life and act like it was not a thing. Sometimes, continuing with life and not allowing your emotions to take over your whole being is smart. But, if it is something that is constantly with you, and putting weight on your heart daily, something needs to happen in order for you to better understand yourself and move forward.

Often when you feel depressed, all you want to do is sleep; at least I do. Sometimes I just want to go in my room and cry until I can’t anymore and listen to music that will only make me feel worse.

Other times, we can do the opposite in order to run away from our feelings. We can fill up our schedules so much, we do not allow ourselves moments to stop and think about the pain going on within our hearts. We mask our emotions and fill ourselves up with false promises, hoping that they will cover up the pain we are feeling inside.

As hard as it may be, when we have the horrible feeling that can come with depression like feeling unknown, unloved or rejected, sometimes we just want to shut down. I find myself every time and again hating who I am because of how I process things and how my head works. I catch myself wondering what it is like to have a more “emotionally stable” heart. But this will get us nowhere. We have to deal with the problems we are handed in life, from where we are at, with the beautiful heart we have been given and the intelligent mind we have as well.

When handling depression, the key for me has been dealing with it head on; admitting who I am, what I struggle with, and where I would like to see myself. We have to accept ourselves. Not only accept who we are but start to grow to love who we are as well. We need to begin embracing the unique qualities God has given us, even if sometimes we struggle.

My life changed one night when I was with my best friend. At my lowest of lows, I was bawling my eyes out. I had hit rock bottom. I was losing hope. I hated who I was and felt insanely hurt by things that had happened to me. I could not stand how depressed I felt every single day.

As hard as it was for her to see me like this, she looked at me and said, “Madi, your healing starts with you.” At that moment, I realized how right she was. My perspective was changed when I started to see that the process of my healing needed to start with me, even if the first step was just admitting how broken I was.

That’s what God is looking for. In Luke 4:18-19, Jesus says “He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” He is not looking for perfect people. He came to set us free, to release us from the worldly issues that tie us down and cause us anxiety. He came to proclaim the good news of a better tomorrow.

So, how do we handle immensely hard situations in our life head-on when all we want to do is run from them?

When I read 1 Chronicles 14, I instantly thought of how David fighting against the Philistines applies to the daily fight against depression. In this chapter, starting with verse eight, the Philistines hear about David being anointed by Samuel to become king. Immediately, the Philistines went with full force after David.

This happens every day with the devil and us. He will do anything to knock you down because he knows you’re chosen. It is important to be aware of who is against you and who is for you and to not be naïve of the fact that Satan comes at our weak spots with full force. That’s why we have to be leaning on the Lord regularly, who is far more powerful than the lies poured into our hearts.

That is what David did. In 1 Chronicles 14:10,  “David asked God, “Should I go fight against the Philistines? Will You give them to me?” And the Lord said to him, “Go, for I will give them to you.”

As the passage continues, David does exactly as God had told him and defeated the Philistines.

I know this sounds so simple, but I think it’s because sometimes it is. It’s about trust, that regardless of how you feel in the moment, no matter how much sadness is welled up within you, you continue to praise the Lord. David was obedient to God because he trusted Him and knew for a fact that God had the best in mind for him.

The Lord is going to do whatever He can to glorify His kingdom and draw you closer to Him. Sometimes He can do this in mysterious ways. Often times in my life, the Lord has done things that I did not want, but I so desperately needed. I believe that sometimes in our lives when we are going through rough times, we feel like everything and everyone is against us. But God is for us and He wants to help you through the fight. He can see things we can’t. He knows your heart and how you feel day in and day out.

We have to start coming to Him as well, with hands wide open, ready to be moved by the Holy Spirit like David was. In an insanely stressful moment, where David could have lost His life, He called upon the Lord and trusted that He was able to save him. We have to start calling upon the Lord to help mend our broken hearts and save us from the pain we are feeling. Nothing of this world can heal those deeps wounds or satisfy what your heart is longing for except the One who created you, because He knows every part of you. He loves you from where ever you are at and will guide you in the perfect direction of what He knows is best for you, if you allow Him to.

I’m so excited for the last part of this series next Monday. We talk about how God helps restore our broken hearts. He can revolutionize them and take the sickness and sadness we feel and make it part of our unique stories that can touch many.



  1. Gail Giaimo says:

    Dear Lynn, my daughter Alicia is up in Washington and I’m down here in California at home and she knew I was discouraged this morning. My dear 14-year-old pointed me to your website and wanted me to read your latest devotional. It’s a constant struggle for us right now for our family to keep our hearts and thoughts directed on trusting the Lord through this difficult time. I know that the enemy can really have a field day when we’re under stress. Thank you for sharing your encouraging words helping us know that we’re not alone when we are feeling anxious and afraid and just want the pain to go away. Jesus can take us right where we are and turn that anxiety and fear into Peace which passes all understanding. I look forward to next Monday’s post! Thank you

    1. Lynn Cowell says:

      Gail – isn’t this amazing? My daughter wrote a post and your daughter shared her words with you for encouragement!

      I think I need to write a post “Things We Can Learn From Our Kids” 🙂

      1. Gail Giaimo says:

        Yes!! I didn’t even realize that it was your daughter’s post until later! I so agree that The Lord teaches us so much through our daughters. It can be humbling and awe inspiring all at the same time! It so puts things in perspective that we are not in control and need to let God work in our daughters lives and let go.

        Btw, like you once mentioned to us, if you ever visit the redwoods we would love to see you and your family!!!!

  2. Madi,
    Thank you for sharing your story. Thank you for being open about your struggle. Thank you for sharing God’s truth and how His Word has helped you.

  3. Christine Cromley says:

    Thank you for this series. I am and have been struggling with depression for some time now. I am beginning to lift out” from under but it is hard. Reading these blogs have been a real blessing for me and I am sure for others as well. I look forward to next week.

    1. Lynn Cowell says:

      Thank you so much, Christine. Making progress toward healing is taking time for Madi as well. As her mom, I see one key factor for her is being consistent to see when she is heading down a slippery slope. Often, letting someone know that she is heading in the wrong direction helps a great deal.

  4. Madi,

    I am so happy to read how you are beginning to see things in a new perspective.

  5. Madi, what a gift God has given you to write and encourage around such a tough subject. My heart thanks you! Love, Kim Stewart

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