Wednesday Wisdom Tip – Divine Disappointment


What a struggle for me.

Seeped in expectation.

Todd Guckenberger recently told me, “Expectation is premeditated resentment.”

That smarted.

Our children are going to experience disappointment. This generation expects to be happy. We have programmed them to believe that they can be anything, do anything and all of their dreams should come true. But that is not what Jesus has said. He has said “in this life you will have troubles, but take heart for I have overcome the world!” (John 16:33)

They are going to get cut from the team. They will not get an invitation to the party. The lead part will be given to someone else and the boy will not ask them to prom.

What’s a mom to do?

We model seeing our situations as divine disappointment.

Yesterday, disappointment was the theme of the day. Vacation plans fell through. More house problems were found. Children made poor choices. My daughter stood in the kitchen, observing my reaction, I am sure.

Thankfully, the Lord helped me to handle it well then, but today, the bummed out feelings came with a vengeance and I just wanted to crawl back in bed.

Ephesians 3:17…I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power…to grasp how wide, long, high, and deep is the love of Christ.  I saw afresh: The Love that gives to me is the same love that keeps from me. 

After the initial pain of the disappointed has worn away, share this truth when your child is disappointed.

Why might God have chosen to keep you from making the team or not given you the lead in the play? Does your child struggle with pride? Share how you struggle with pride (if you need some stories, just shoot me an email, I’ll share some of mine!)

What could God’s reason be for not allowing you to be invited to the party? Does He have other friends lined up for your good?

Did God have that boy reject you to protect you?

The Love that gives to your child is the same Love that keeps from your child. 

Let’s teach our children to look to their perfect Father and see that maybe it’s a divine disappointment.



  1. Dealing with a child’s sports disappointment this week – and oh how I needed this message. It is a struggle to know when to encourage and when to stop striving. A true heart’s passion is sent from God, but yet there are bumps in the road that make you question the pursuit. Praying to know when enough is enough and that I can find the words to help my girl know if this is divine disappointment.

  2. Thank you for this today Lynn! My children are still young but still watching my every move….I reacted poorly this morning but my new prayer is this: “Lord please help me to walk in Love, Joy, Patience, Goodness, Meekness, Faith, Gentleness, Peace, and Self Control!” I know that seems so elementary but it is exactly what God spoke to my heart today… Thanks again!

  3. I’m not a mother but this is great! I recently had a BIG disappointment but I know that God has a reason and I can’t wait to see what it is! Thanks for sharing!

  4. My adult daughter has faced a lot of disappointment the past couple of years in trying to start a career in her field. It breaks my heart, but I know her faith sustains her through it all.

  5. Good post. I think sometimes we set up our children to be discouraged and frustrated by not allowing them to deal and feel with disappointments at a young age. You know – the – everyone gets to play some time in the game, etc. It is good for them to see the reality of life – even if as a parent its hard and hurts to watch it happen.

    1. I completely agree, Dionna. In many ways I don’t think the “every one gets a trophy just for showing up” has been good for our kids. It sure doesn’t teach them to be strong!

  6. Sometimes we wish we could take the disappointment for them, don’t we? So glad we can trust our Father to do what is right for them each and every time!

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