I’m always looking for opportunities to bring up dating when talking with my kids. You never know when the next guy she goes out with becomes the one she spends her life with. (Look at me – I started crushing on my husband in 6th grade!)
Recently, I asked Madi:
What do you think is the most important character quality to look for in a guy?
Madi’s choices included: loyalty and faithfulness. I have to agree.
Faithfulness is one of many qualities Madi and I discovered when we were studying the life of Joseph, Mary’s husband in the Matthew 1. I find 3 more traits our girls should look for in a date. Joseph was:
Finding out his fiancé was pregnant, a proud man would make a spectacle of her. Humiliation would have been used to protect himself. Not Joseph. Matthew 1:19 in the NLT says, “Joseph, her fiancé, was a good man and did not want to disgrace her publicly, so he decided to break the engagement quietly.”
Quietly. Humility finds no reason to draw attention to himself.
Mary’s pregnancy would have been humiliating for Joseph. Even if he had the chance to tell his story, there would be those who wouldn’t hear the truth nor believe if they did. So many who would have judged him. Even in his plan to quietly divorce her, Joseph prepared to show mercy. The law gave him the permission he needed to be cruel, but was choosing compassion.
When the angel appeared to Joseph in a dream and told him the truth of Mary’s pregnancy, Joseph was immediately obedient to God. Verse 24 tells us, “When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him…” No hesitation. No excuses or justification.
These are just a few of the traits demonstrated in the life of Joseph. Find a few quiet moments, in the car, before bed, while making dinner and start your own conversation about the godly man named Joseph. Let your girl find the traits she sees first; you can fill in the blanks later.
Let’s teach our girls what a real man looks like. Humble, merciful and obedient.