Where I Got Hung Up When My Girls Were Growing Up


Raise a godly girl? Raising a girl is hard enough!

What does raising a godly girl even mean?

Does it mean raising a girl who is loving, joyful, peaceful?

Yes, these are all characteristics we hope to see developed in our girls; exactly what we teach our girls to become.

But what about words like … strong, brave, confident. Those are all good words too; adjectives that we would like to define our daughters one day as well.

And then what about other words? Words like girl power. Those can’t describe a godly girl … can they?

And that is where raising a girl who honors God can get all kinds of confusing … when “girl power” comes in.

Is it an either/or when we want to raise a girl to become a woman who is like Jesus, not only in the way that He was kind, compassionate and loving, but also bold and courageous?

A difference maker?

Last year, I studied God’s word to find the answer to this conflict I felt; this wrestling in my heart.

Strong or gentle?

Bold or meek?

I found my answer in the women of Exodus – Shiphrah and Puah, Jochebed and Miriam (Exodus 1 & 2), the daughters of Zelophehad (Numbers 27), Deborah and Jael (Judges 4), Abigail (1 Samuel 25) and Sheerah (1 Chronicles 7). I could go on for so long!

The answer is not either/or; it is “and”.

A godly woman is both.

Our calling is to raise a girl full of gentleness, faithfulness, self-control and she is a strong, bold, difference-making brave beauty.

My own daughters, both social work majors, have shown me where I got hung up when they were growing up. I didn’t know the true definition of some words that can be used to describe strong women. I saw division and I always want to lined up with Jesus and His word; rightly so.

Yet, from what I read in the gospels, Jesus “advocated for social, political, legal, and economic rights for women equal to those of men” (Dictionary.com). I was very surprised when I looked up the definition of the word feminist.

God was the one who said, “For the LORD your God is God of gods and Lord of lords, the great God, mighty and awesome, who shows no partiality and accepts no bribes.” Deu. 10:17 (NIV) as well as Acts 10:34-35 “Then Peter began to speak: “I now realize how true it is that God does not show favoritism but accepts from every nation the one who fears him and does what is right” (NIV). Then there is Galatians 3:28-29 “There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham’s seed, and heirs according to the promise.” (NIV)

I am so thankful that my eyes are opening to the purpose Jesus has for us, as women, in the earth today. I am so glad that I can encourage my girls to follow hard after what God requires of us as His representatives:”He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” Michah 6:8 (NIV)

Friends, the body of Christ needs our daughters to be the next generation of women who will change culture; change the world. You and I are raising the next Catherine Booths, Harriet Tubmans and Esthers. Our job is to show them these strong role models in Scripture and in history, that they can emulate today … and to be those models for them as well.

To help your girl begin the journey toward becoming brave, I’m offering a free 5 day, printable devotional for your her,  Grounded: Standing Firm in A Roller Coaster World, just click here.


Brave Beauty: Finding the Fearless You , brings young girls 100 courage-building moments to reflect on Scripture and find confidence in God, rather than in someone, some place, or some thing, as culture will all-too-soon tell them to. Lynn will also prepare girls to:

  • Overcome confidence-defeating thoughts and stand on who Jesus says she is.
  • Shape her self-worth on Christ and overcome the temptation base it on environmental factors.
  • Build a strong foundation to face the fickle and flippant opinions of others.
  • Find approval of herself even when she lacks the acceptance of others.
  • Find security by turning to Christ as she steps through the exciting, yet scary world of growing up

Click here to purchase a copy for your girl! 







  1. Amen! Such needed truth today! As a mom of three daughters, I have seen the importance in sharing the message of our girls being world changers, too. Thank you for this message today, Lynn! <3

  2. Susan Milillo says:

    I am so sorry, but I was confused as to the distinction you were making. I love you! Will you please do me a favor and clarify? How was what you thought different from what your daughters thought again??

    1. Lynn Cowell says:

      Susan … thank you so much for asking this question. I so appreciate you!

      As a young woman, my own views of what a woman who loved God looked like were very limited. In fact, my dream was to marry a pastor because I knew that I wanted to serve God through my vocation and I thought that was the only way a woman could do so. (And that didn’t happen! Instead I married a man who supports me in the ministry God has called me to!)

      Now that I have read the Bible through many, many times I can clearly see that my views and beliefs were not built on the whole of God’s word, but a few scriptures plucked out and taught to me. These views only highlighted one side of God’s truth in His word.

      As my girls got older, I passed on these same views. I stayed away from topics such as women in leadership, equal pay for equal work, etc. My reason? I didn’t want to take a stand on what I was unsure of. I was unsure was because I hadn’t taken the time to find out what God’s word said on these sometimes controversial topics, I clung to what I had been taught, and I despise confrontation.

      It has only been in the past few years, as my relationship with my girls is moving from coaching to friendship, that I have begun to see things differently. They have been asking their own questions on what they believe and we’re having good and sometimes hard conversations. When I was challenged to know what I believed the Bible said, it caused me to dig in and find out what it said.

      Always, always, always … God’s word is the final word. I think the important thing is for us to know what God’s word says for ourselves, rather than looking to culture or tradition. His word is the final word.

      I hope this helps!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.