Welcome to those of you visiting from the Proverbs 31 Ministries devotion. I’m glad you’re here!
There probably isn’t one of you visiting today who hasn’t been impacted by a mean girl at one time or another. My senior year, it was actually a mean guy. To tell you the truth, he really wasn’t so mean; in fact, he was a good friend of mine. But don’t you know even friends can really hurt us sometimes! I can remember it like it was yesterday. I was standing in the Social Studies hall of Cedar Falls High School when he called out for all to hear, “Lynn, why do you bother wearing a bra? You are so flat, you should just wear band-aids!” It doesn’t have to be untrue to be mean, does it friends! This same “friend” nick named me “Lucy” from the Peanuts gang…not exactly what you would call “hot” nor a comparison a girl in high school wants!
Fortunately, God’s word is full of the truth on how He sees me…and you! I’d love to say that the damaging words of my youth were left back in time, but that’s not true. In fact, the Bible tells us that the tongue has the power of life and death in Proverbs 18:21. If our words are that powerful, than friend, let’s use them to our advantage!
Overcoming the Mean Girl
When my kids have run into (and still run into) mean “girls”, I share with them these three truths:
1) Most mean people are hurting people.
Have you ever heard the saying “Wounded dogs bite?” Ask your child a few questions about the offender. Do they get picked on? Do you know anything about their family life? Do they struggle to make friends? The answer to some of these questions just may contain the reason they pick on others.
2) Jealousy can be the cause.
People will often “bite” at those they are jealous of; those they wish they could be like. Is your child smart? Successful? Well liked? If jealousy is the root cause, the best thing you can do is simply walk away and don’t say a word.
3) Your child might be provoking it.
This is the hardest one for us to believe…my child? Ask your child what type of interaction is happening between them and the offended. Is your child correcting the person? Does your child annoy the offender? Too often as parents we miss the fact that our child is actually bringing some of the behavior on. If we suspect that may be the problem but can’t pinpoint it, it may help to ask a teacher who witnesses the dynamic between them.
Mom, remember that a confident child is far less likely to be picked on that one with low self-esteem. You can play a huge part in instilling God-powered confidence in the life of your daughter. On Monday, we’ll be starting chapter one of my study “His Revolutionary Love” here on my blog and on FaceBook at Lynn Cowell’s Online Bible Studies. It’s not too late for you to begin this study with your daughter or a young woman in your life who needs to know that she is crazy about. her. Confidence created by Love empowers girls to make wise choices. Be a wiser woman raising wiser daughters!
Today I am giving away a signed copy of “His Revolutionary Love” as well as the foundational message at my “Revolutionary Love” conferences on DVD. Just share with me by clicking on comments below which of the three tips above you thought was the most helpful to be included in our give away. And if you just don’t have time for that say, “I’m in!” Can’t wait to hear from you! Be sure to stop back by on Monday when I will post the winner!