“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Isaiah 41:10 NIV
A volcano spewing out pent up lava, my heart threw up sorrow. The sobbing just wouldn’t stop. Each time I tried to gain control, another wave of reality hit me, sending me to a fetal position on my office floor.
For months I had prayed and quoted scripture; putting my trust in the Lord. But this day there was a breach in the dam and I just couldn’t hold back the force of tears. I was completely dismayed; my courage completely gone.
“How did we get to this place, God? How?” My heart really didn’t want the answer; it wouldn’t change a thing. He knew what I truly needed, a dose of hope where only dejection laid.
The reality of the pain in our lives threatens some days to take us down; pulling us to a place of deep sorry where we feel alone. That place is strange. Pouring out pain can be good…and it can be bad.
Expression of hurt can be a catharsis, emptying the pent up stress, creating relief. Other times, it’s an abscessed tooth. Running our tongue over and over it just to feel the pain, aggravating our aching heart more. We know what we need; we need to run to Jesus who wants to hold us up.
To be honest, when I’m hurting so, sometimes I don’t want to go to Jesus. What I want to do is crawl in bed and pull the covers up over my head. Yet, if I will take that first step, and then the next, I can walk away from being dismayed and toward the strength Jesus offers. My thoughts and words become my weapons as I fight to regain hope that comes when I am in his presence.
“So do not fear, for I am with you…I will strengthen you and help you…I will uphold you.” (Isaiah 41:10 NIV) His words offer hope.
Jesus truly is the only one who can bring real hope in the dark places of our lives. Even if we can run to a husband, friend or parent, they can’t fix what causes us deep sorrow. When no one else can comfort, he can.
Let’s not make Jesus our last option; make him our first.