No Mom-of-the-Year Awards for Me
Today, my special guest blogger is Jennifer Rothschild, nationally known author and speaker who has written 11 books, including the bestsellers Lessons I Learned in the Dark, Self Talk-Soul Talk and her latest release, Invisible: How You Feel Is Not Who You Are.
She’s been featured on Good Morning America, The Dr. Phil Show, The Learning Channel, Women of Faith and Extraordinary Women. She is the founder of Fresh Grounded Faith events and womensministry.net. She and her husband, whom she affectionately calls “her very own Dr. Phil,” have 2 sons and a lovely daughter-in-law. Jennifer is a CS Lewis junkie who enjoys strong coffee, dark chocolate, great conversation, international travel and audiobooks. Jennifer became blind at age fifteen and now helps others live beyond limits. Learn more at www.JenniferRothschild.com
Here’s Jennifer:
“Okay, here’s an honest question for you:
Have you ever felt swallowed up in the dailiness of your life—doing the same old chores and tasks over and over and over again?
I sure have. I think we all have.
When I was a young mom, I remember one particular night when Clayton was 13 years old and about as emotionally exhausting as a child could be. “Why can’t I… ” or “How come everyone else is allowed to… ” and “That isn’t fair!” were the phrases I was combating all day long. And I mean A-L-L day long!
At the same time, I had three-year-old Connor, who was physically exhausting—busy, active, and loud! One of his favorite things to do was pull all the pots and pans from the cabinet and bang on them with wooden spoons. So while Clayton was draining my brain, Connor was wearing me out!
That night, to escape the constant interrogation from budding lawyer Clayton and the banging and clanging of little drummer Connor, I escaped into my closet and shut the door. I tried to ease my tension by doing some Lamaze breathing—you think that is only for the pain of childbirth? Sister, you need that for the pain of child rearing!
After a few deep breaths, I thought I could face them again without screaming or crying. I don’t mean their screaming or crying—I mean mine! What I really wanted to do was run away from home!
When the drumming ended, I heard Connor asking Clayton, “Where’s Mommy?”
“I dunno,” Clayton grunted.
Evidently, though, they discussed this enough to send out a search party. I heard them calling, but I didn’t answer. I heard them opening and closing doors, but I stayed hidden behind mine.
I soon heard them coming down the hall, knocking on my bedroom door, calling, “Mom! Mommy! ”
I must admit I will win no Mom-of-the-Year awards for what I’m about to tell you.
I ignored them.
I so wanted to disappear that I didn’t answer them. I thought, I’ve had it. They’ll be fine. Clay can take care of Connor for just a little while. Heck, he can raise him.
Then I heard Connor ask, “Can I have a Capri Sun?”
“Sure! Go get one,” Clayton replied.
Well, that’s all it took. There was no way my three-year-old was going to open one of those exploding juice grenades all by himself I bolted out of the closet and into the kitchen.
Now, wouldn’t you think that someone at that point would have asked, “Where were you?” Nope! Connor just asked for some cookies, and Clayton launched into a closing argument about why he was innocent of the juice that was splattered all over the kitchen!
I know I’m not alone here, right? Every woman has had those moments when she gets familiarity fatigue.
You would think the familiar would be a reassuring place, but sometimes we can feel stuck in the familiar.
It just doesn’t seem right that something as amazing as motherhood could ever get old. But when the dailiness of motherhood – the serving, the disciplining, the running around – overwhelms us and feels all too familiar, we can lose sight of those moments of joy and how amazing it really is.
And, it’s the same thing with the reality that we are God’s beloved. We are loved by our God, sister. He sees us; He sees you. (Even when you’re hiding in a closet!)
When the dailiness of life overwhelms you, you can overlook the truth that you are His workmanship. You are the apple of His Eye. Your name is etched in the palm of His hand. You are loved with an everlasting love.
When something becomes familiar, it can be overlooked. You’ve heard it over and over—God loves you and you matter to Him. Maybe you’ve seen in the Bible that you are the apple of His Eye! But, it’s all too easy to get so used to those truths about us that we can forget that we are the loved, accepted and complete daughters of God Himself! We can start to feel stuck, when actually, the truth about who we are sets us free!
Now, that makes me want to bang some pots and pans and lift my Capri Sun in a toast to you and all those beautiful truths about us that I don’t ever want to overlook!
Sister, let me leave you with this question. What truth about you is so familiar that you are prone to overlook it? Carefully consider this question, and join me in this prayer:
Lord, interrupt my routine today. I can get so distracted and can lose sight of how radical your love for me is. Remind me of your truths and keep them fresh on my heart.”
Jennifer Rothschild’s new book, Invisible: How You Feel is Not Who You Are is now available! If you order this week, you’ll receive several free gifts as Jennifer’s way to say thank you! Go to theInvisibleBook.org to learn more and grab your copy.
Today, Jennifer is giving away 3 copies of her new book Invisible. For a chance to win one of these copies, just share how or when you have felt invisible. If you’re in a hurry, just say, “I’m in!”
when i am in a family get together with my husband”s family
In the midst of the same old mundane tasks at home every day… Sometimes I feel like no one ever notices unless they aren’t done. I know they appreciate it but it feels very monotonous somedays and I wonder what more there could be. Is there room for me to pursue my dreams and interests while still being mom and wife? I know there is, just hard to carve out the time to work on it.
I’m in
I have been feeling invisible in my career for the last 4 to 5 years. I am a teacher without a permanent job. For the last 2 years I have been supplying and it seems that there is no end in sight. I know that I am excellent at what I do but for whatever reason I can’t seem to move out of this place of uncertainty. I know that God has been working on teaching me to trust Him more but it is not an easy or pleasant place to be. I definitely feel invisible and overlooked and it is affecting how I view myself. I am most definitely a “work in progress” and thank God that He isn’t finished with me yet!
I’m in!!
Thanks for this post. I’m in!
It is so nice to know I am not alone. This is not something women usually talk about. Thank God for using writers like you to reach people like me.
I’m in.
I am in!!
I am not invisible, I am worthy. I know this…but believing it, living it out is much more difficult.
I am in!!
I feel invisible when I am in pain. I am recovering from brain surgery and have to deal with headaches and severe neck pain. I also go through rigorous PT for balance and strengthening of muscles. Sometimes I wonder if God remembers me in my pain or if He has forgotten and I am invisible. But thank y he Lord when those thoughts come to mind, I remember the Love of the cross and that nothing can separate me from God’s Love.
My husband was in Kosovo (deployed for 9 months). I was a wife of less than 4 years…birthing 3 children in 4 years…living in a foreign country (Germany).
I have had the exact moment you shared…many times. Those were very hard times. But through that season, Daddy – God was stretching me. Stretching my heart.
Now, after doing life with my husband and 3 children for 12 more years…my heart is bigger and more flexible because of that stretching.
It is more equipped to handle the bigger, even more complicated aspects of my life. ♡
I am in! 😉
I’m in!
Wow! “Invisible” is exactly the word I’ve used over and over to describe how I felt growing up and many times in my adulthood. This book would help me resolve those feelings and learn to internalize the fact that I know is true: I’m not invisible to God. Winning this book would be a special blessing. If I don’t win I need to buy one as soon as I am able.
I feel invisible constantly. Unless someone wants or needs something from me, I am pretty sure I go unseen, unnoticed, unheard etc. It stinks and I don’t know how to not feel this way!
I am feeling invisible right now – when my two teenage daughters are being “bought” by my ex-husband who is earning much of his money illegally and they turn and throw it in my face. I left my marriage for domestic violence reasons and to give my girls a much safer and better life. I won’t play the game of buying my kids nor will I dispariage him the way he does me – but they are 16 and 13 year old girls now and who wouldn’t be swayed by being bought at their age? I hate when they go back to their dads and call me and tell me about all of the wonderful trips their dad is taking them on (Hawaii here soon) and all of the clothes they have gotten and how wonderful life is over there and why can’t it be like that at my house. It makes me want to crawl in a hole – but I also know that I am doing what is right for them and hope that one day they will see that. I left with pretty much nothing because it was pointless to fight for money when all I wanted was out and safety. I know I made the right decision for all of us but Lord this is a heavy burden on my heart.
As strange as this may sound, even though I am a little over 6 ft tall as a woman, I feel invisible because people only see my height and they don’t see the real me inside. It’s frustrating when I only want people to know that I am more than my height. I have feelings, dreams, goals, preferences, dislikes, etc…. just like everyone else. I just come in a taller package.
I’m in.
I don’t know why it happens exactly, but even now as a grandma with 3 kids and 6 wonderful grandkids, some day I become invisible to many of them…well not so much with the younger grandkids. 🙂
I usually pray and think how thankful I am to have all good kids and good grandkids, who most all of them know Jesus. I’m working on those few who do not!
I just love Jennifer and would love to read this book.
Thanks to you both!
May you both be blessed!
I can still be invisible to the kids and the older grandkids but not to the little grandkids. 🙂
Looking forward to reading the book!
Thanks to you both!
I’m in!!
As the mom of a teenage boy…the last to leave thr roost…he is so busy with all his activities I feel invisible and un appreciated. Then he’ll text me and say “love you mom”.
I’m in
I’m in!!
I’m in.
I’ve felt invisible in many different seasons, and I’m in.
I can feel invisible when I miss my daily time with Jesus. I feel disconnected in my heart, even though my head knows He is still with me!
When I am at a new church visiting & I don’t know anyone, especially if my hubby isn’t with me. ?
“I’m in”
I feel invisible right now in my life. My husband and I moved across country so year ago, and three months later had a little girl. We only have one car, so I can’t visit the few friends I’ve made. Because my husband works retail, we can’t consistently get to Life Group at church, or hang out at the life group events. People will offer to pick me up, but when they find out I live about 30 minutes away, they straight up tell me that I’m too far away and they can’t pick me up. So, I spend pretty much every day with just me and my daughter while my husband is at work. I’ll reach out to friends and not get much response back. I’m learning to be content with where God has me right now, and using my free and quiet time to read, learn and study. This quiet space has allowed my husband and I to step out and start a ministry that we felt God placing on our hearts, so I’m focusing on that rather than dwelling on the feeling of being invisible.