Wednesday Wisdom Tip: Does It Really Matter?
What is the number one argument in your family?
(Go ahead and share in the comments below. We can try and help each other here!)
Our’s?
Appearance
It started very early, when one of my girls wanted high-heeled boots for Christmas one year … and she was in third grade. I’ll admit it; I caved on the boots and the long dangling earrings too. In middle school, it was eye liner and V-neck shirts.
I dreaded the struggle; I’m guessing you do too. I wanted our relationship to be close and this struggle was a constant wedge in the younger years.
No matter what our age as women, culture tells us, “Dress for you! Don’t let someone else dictate what you wear!” Yet, this same culture shouts ” Dress like the girl every guy wants.” How confusing these messages are, not just for our girls, but for us as well. Even culture admits: what we wear does matter.
With my girls, I have constantly used the argument that as women we have the power to grab a guy’s attention, and it’s a power that is easily abused. But today, I’ve decided I’ve taken the wrong approach all these years.
We’ve made the argument about the wrong guy.
In Exodus 28, God describes in detail how the priest was to dress. God told Moses, “Make sacred garments for your brother Aaron, to give him dignity and honor.” (v.2) He goes on to describe an ornate and colorful garment, studded in precious jewels.
Aaron dressed in these garments because he represented Almighty God. His clothes were a constant reminder to others and to himself of who he was … God’s.
So are we.
We are holy to the Lord. We are his people; his treasured possession.
Our purpose is to declare his praises and that includes the way we dress.
Do I think the way we dress impacts the guys around us? Absolutely. But even more important than that, I want the way I dress to make an even greater statement:
I am His and He is mine.
Those skinny jeans . . . .since she insists (and she really is right) those jeans fit her the best (she is very petite) I have asked her to wear long tops with them. She does but then she will put on a quick t-shirt. I don’t like having to remind her bit she is doing better . . .
Did you hear that flare jeans are what’s coming in now, Dot? Yeah!
I have to tell ya I am so lucky in the clothes department. my house its attitudes.. my teens and tweens are getting really bad at controlling their tempers… they get it honestly though. God has been working on mine for a while and I am still reading His word on anger… now I am trying to teach my children the same… will be a long run….
I think it is so amazing when we can work together with our kids on our struggles. Our humility with them goes a long way!
God just led me to your website in a time where I’ve never needed it more. I was raised in the church as was/is my daughter. So many struggles that started with clothing and now is leading to internet issues and boys. And she’s only 13! I never imagined parenting would be this heart-wrenching this early in the game. We attend church together and serve together, but I truly question if she’s really “getting it” at all. It’s time for me to pray harder and work harder on her than ever before. I was feeling so tired and defeated, and God is revealing himself to me and giving me strength and guidance like never before. I will not give up! Your blog is just another sign that He is with me and I am not and will never be alone. So thank you for doing His work. You are a priceless soul!
I am so very glad we’ve connected, Amy! I’ll look forward to hearing from you in the future!
I think clothing is a reflection of what is on the inside. I have been an active church member all my life and always wanted to dress modestly. Modest dress was not a problem with my children who are now adults. However, I am dismayed at the way some people-teenagers and adults- dress. Thank you for reminding us to dress for the right person-God.
My daughter has type 1 diabetes. She is almost 16 and diagnosed at 13. It has been a very big issue for us. She finally admitted she was angry about it and choose not to accept she had it. That is why she didn’t take care of herself. We got her into some intense counseling that is Christian based and it has not only changed her but me. It has been the best thing I have ever done with my daughter. At this point, we have a very good relationship that I cherish. I never thought it would be like this. I was so frustrated with her before but now I look forward to the time I spend with her. She still has her occasional days that she just doesn’t want to do the diabetes care but it’s not often. I truly give God the glory for all of this. I prayed and also got very close with the pastors of our church over this. They helped me so much. It truly has been the neatest God thing in my life. We think as parents we do all the teaching, I am here to be a witness that my daughter gave me the teaching on this one! It has been awesome.
Vicki – you are an amazing mom! Your daughter is so very blessed to have you!