Wednesday Wisdom Tip – ~It is that Big of a Deal~

“Love is patient, love is kind…” 1 Corinthians 13:4a

Ever have those days when your child’s emotions are so unstable she goes from crying to laughing faster than a sell out on Black Friday?

At moments like these, we think, “Here we go again!” We just want her to calm down. In an effort to move this process along we might even say to her: “This isn’t that big of a deal.”

When we hurry our child past the emotions she’s feeling, we’re really saying: “I don’t really care. You’re annoying me.” We invalid their feelings. She may feel we don’t care about the things she cares about causing her to feel alone even unloved.

If, instead, we choose to listen and learn, we can hear the heart of our child. Beyond the tears and raised voice, there is pain, rejection, or excitement. Listening past the words to hearing the heart will open doors for you to encourage her and to show her real unconditional love.

Remember: what you sow you reap. Listen today; you might need to be heard tomorrow.

Give me patience and compassion, Jesus, for those who need to be loved by me. Amen



  1. Oh boy! This is great advice. My 17 & 19 year old daughters are right in the middle of this stage.
    Thank you for reminding me… listen and encourage!

  2. Excellent, Lynn! Thank you for this reminder to listen, to not minimize or maximize what my beloved 17 year old is experiencing in the ups and downs of her young life. Lord help me to hear and listen…and not to dismiss!

  3. Thank you Lynn. I have been so busy…your Wednesday Word, is my Thursday Thoughts. Like Wanda I have a 17 and 19 year old daughter that are in the thick of this.
    My 17year old daughter has “intense emotions” and in contrast the 19 year old is compliant and cries to herself,but when she blows stuff flies (Like plates). The 17 year old remembers the plate flying, but her behavior is so intense every day and she doesn’t see the low and highs of her sister.
    I set back and remember the words I am told often by friend and strangers, “When they are older they will see how they acted and appreciate you.” I have sat up all night with the “intense one” and I have sat holding the “quiet crier” praying with her. Equal time….no…I have never been able to give equal time to my 4 children. That went out with giving them each a Baby doll 16 years ago when their baby brother was born.
    I home schooled them all until this year and the baby brother went to a New Tech High School, while the girls are all in college. One thing I have learned is that I can not rush their emotions.

    “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.”
    (James 1:19-20 ESV)

    That should be a mother’s motto.

  4. Deena, God must have thought that combination was good, because I got the same “combo” in my girls only their brother came first.

    I love your motto. Some days (like yesterday…all last week in fact) this raising teens stuff is so overwhelming. Tonight…we have decisions to give to both of our girls…they’ll probably not like either.

    Jesus…give us the wisdom we lack and the courage to not give our kids more responsibility than they are ready to handle both emotionally and physically. Thank you for supplying us with all that we need. We’re desperate for you! Amen

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