Putting away the laundry this morning, I was tempted to return them to my shelve. When I heard the voice from this weekend.
“Mom, you need some new jeans.”
Really? I had thought these ones were in.
When I asked why, I was informed that “bling” is still in…just not for women my age!
I’m so tempted to disregard my girls’ comments.
See, I’m a very frugal person and spending money to keep up on trends is just something I’m not really into.
Yet yesterday I was reminded at The MOB Society, my kids care about my appearance. It’s not so much about having a wardrobe that is “in” this season or “out” next. (My girls are more than fine when I’m wearing my Levi’s, worn-out sweatshirt and hiking boots).
It has more to do with how my kids feel about me…their mom.
I can hear some of you now,
“Aren’t you taking that a bit too far? They’re the kids; we’re the adults!”
For me the real questions are:
Do I want my kids to want to introduce me to their friend?
Do I want my child to be embarrassed of me?
Does my appearance say that I am aware of the current culture or am I stuck in a time warp? (Because if my clothes are stuck, maybe my beliefs are too! Not that they would verbalize that, but you just never know where the mind will go!)
In the past, I have gotten around “being in style” one way; I take my girls with me when I shop or I ask them questions when I get home.
Is this too old for me?
Is this too young?
Too big? Too tight? Just plain ugly? (Smile)
When I do, I don’t just gain the opportunity to be a more “in” mom, I gain another level of relationship. I’ve asked their opinion and that makes them feel valued.
Ask your girl today how she feels about your appearance. She might just drop over because you asked!
PS…anybody want some bling bling jeans? 🙂
Thanks so much for sharing this blog post….as this topic is something that has been on my mind. I am typing this from my oldest daughters apartment on her college campus. (She lives in a married student housing section.) Just this morning I looked in the mirror and asked myself the question, “Would you want to introduce me to your college friends?” Taking care of my appearance is something that doesn’t come natural to me, but your words helped remind me of the important example I am setting for my daughters.
Thanks much for all you do!
Julie McD says
Ha! No bling jeans, but a quick affirmation comment. My youngest of three, and only daughter, is 7 and has been fashion conscious (in her own style) for a long time. I have made it a point to regularly talk to her about her choice of clothing and mine and I often solicit her opinion about a particular outfit when I put it together for work. Even though she is small, it changes the relationship a bit for a moment and adds another level of comfortableness to our banter, one that I hope will grow to encompass other social issues as she gets older. Point well made in your post. Blessings and bling throughout your Advent season!
Your post made me chuckle as it reminded me of a comment my 13yo daughter said to me a few months ago. I said to her after buying some nice boots that I needed some “skinny” jeans so that they would stay in place in the boot. She replied “Mom, your too old for “skinny” jeans!!!” Luckily we found a pair with “skinny” lower legs, tht didn’t look painted on and she was quite pleased. We just started sharing shoes and it has definitely brought our relationship to level. They value our opinion even if they don’t want us to know it and they want us to value theirs.
Debra Weiss says
Great post. I live in a household of girls so all I have to do is ask, “What do you think…?” to get four opinions. If three out of four say it looks good on me then I keep it. I guess I dress by jury. 🙂
Cindy H says
My twelve year old is the fashion diva in our home 🙂 She and I both read Ms. Shari’s “Good Girls Don’t Have to Dress Bad”. I recently took her shopping and decided I needed some new jeans. She had so much fun bringing items to my dressing room and giving her opinion on what worked and what didn’t. The sales ladies had a blast watching her and asking her how old she was, because they wanted to hire her!!
Lynn Cowell says
Last night, Madi and I went through my wardrobe…or should I say Madi went through my wardrobe! To be honest, there really isn’t a whole lot left. So many, many things…too young for you, too old for you. How old is this anyway?
Of all the things she pulled out, I think I put back 3 🙂
And you know, at this point, I don’t think I’m going to replace any of it. At least for awhile, I am content to just wear the things I can feel good in!