Wow…that year went fast. My prescription of Synthroid is running low so it was time to head to taht place again. So today was my lucky day. Time to go and get the blood drawn again. When I saw my doctor she reminded me that I had “somehow” foregone my annual last year. Did I know that? (Of course I did…who wants to get that done anyway?) To give you some insight, I turned 40 last year and have yet to schedule my first base-line mammogram. I have issues when it comes to doctors.
Here is a bit of writing from my journal a week or so ago – I think it was the day I actually made my doctor’s appointment. Thinking of my physical doctor made me think of my spiritual doctor.
Even though I generally dread going to doctors, instinctively I know that this One can be trusted and truly knows what He is doing.
I showed up for my appointment and got right in. It sure is a peaceful place. I knew He’d be right in, but I decided to pick up the book He authored as I waited. As I read His book I was again amazed at His wisdom and just how much He knew about the human race. Just as He promised, He came right in and began to discuss with me my current health care plan. He gave me the words I didn’t want to hear. I needed more surgery. I don’t know why I dreaded it so much…probably because I was aware of the risks that were involved. I could see that there was no other alternative, but I still had to make the choice. I can tell you, this was no easy decision for me. Upon my last visit to His Word, He gave me the reasons for the surgery. I suffered from a chronic case of performing – living for the applauds of others. I had been struggling with this disease all of my life. After treatment, I had found healing. But sometimes, after finding myself in battle with the enemy or in a conflict with my mind, I would become wounded and need treatment again. Finding life, all of life in Him alone, was my only cure. Yet I still seemed to struggle with that complete surrender and trust.