Yesterday after school, my youngest quipped, “You sure are acting calm.” Why did she say that? Because it was such a surprise to her! Calming the mama drama has been a desire of my heart and the baby steps of growth are finally beginning to show.
During these years of raising three teens, there are a few key points that are helping me to stop the actions that were destructive in the relationships with my children and instead building a bridge to their hearts. Here are three of the six points I share on my CD “Building a Bridge to Your Child’s Heart”:
1) Be informed.
The more I am informed about what is going on in their culture, the less shocked I am when they open up and share their world with me.
Friend, I just can’t tell you how important this one is. When we act shocked or devastated by their culture, it causes them to feel that we are “out of it”; we don’t get what is going on.
Keep in touch with the culture. Listen as they are talking with their friends. Be aware.
2) Be approachable.
What would your child tell you if they knew you would not interrupt, not pass judgment or yell? By child number three, I have learned they will share a lot! If you want to be a part of their world, especially when they are teens, you have to be approachable.
Proverbs 15:1 “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
Being approachable opens the door for your child to share his world with you even when he is feeling guilty, fearful or sad. It provides a way to share in his excitement, joys and good times too!
Our body language, tone of voice and reactions all contribute to being approachable.
How would your child rate you in this area?
3) Be accessible.
Slowing down is important so that we can be accessible to our kids when they are ready to talk. If our day is crammed full of running around with activities, volunteering, etc. it will leave little room for real relationship.
Today, I am giving away one copy of my talk on CD “Building a Bridge to Your Child’s Heart” (where I share all six points) as well as a Starbucks card so you can enjoy some time being available to your child!
To enter to win, simply share which one of these points would be the most helpful in your relationship with your child if you started taking this step today.
I’ll be posting tomorrow on my “Wednesday Wisdom Tips” the name of the winner!